Jane Ridley

October 2016

It was an unusually warm and sunny day in May of 2013, I was driving — rushing to an unfamiliar athletic track across town to see my daughter run the four by four at districts. She was so happy to have made it this far, and was expecting me to be there to cheer her on. In my haste I took a wrong exit, and had pulled over on the side of the road to check directions, when my phone rang – it was my OB/GYN. Matter-of- factly, she told me a that my recent biopsy had revealed cancer cells that were suspected to be a clear cell carcinoma of the uterus, maybe the cervix, there was some doubt which. She wanted to talk more and help direct me with the next steps, but I was in a hurry, I told her I would call her back the next day. I had a race to watch!

Up until this point my medical journey had been unremarkable. I was a healthy 48-year old; I had two children, a busy job and was living a happy and fulfilled life. The only issues I was monitoring were a (supposed) ovarian cyst of a year and half, fibroids, and very low iron levels etc.; no real cause for alarm was ever noted on my ultra sound scans or blood work. Many women have similar issues. Unusually, it was my annual PAP that presented some abnormal cells that warranted the further investigation. (And, at the last minute, on a hunch, my OB/GYN decided to also include a uterine biopsy as well as cervical.)

What I now call the “cancer-train” then swung into motion. My OB/GYN referred me to a local gynecologic oncologist; a treatment plan was formed, surgery was scheduled, blood work was done, and then – free-fall! I remember waiting three weeks from diagnosis until surgery, which is not much time, but it felt like an aeon to me. I was not particularly afraid, but I had many questions, and thoughts, and I did my best to try to stay away from Google; thankfully my job and my teen children kept me busy and on task! My family had just weathered another medical crisis and I felt that we would be OK and get through this, too. My husband had recently, against all odds, survived a near-death, lengthy illness and I had been a fierce advocate for him. I had asked a lot of questions, and did not stop until I felt as though every medical option/stone had been unturned for him.

Now that I was facing a potentially frightening illness of my own, surprisingly, I could not summon that same vigor of advocacy for myself. I have come to learn this is not uncommon. I will be forever grateful for my close friends/family who stepped in during this time and accompanied me to doctor appointments, took notes, researched, helped me ask questions, cooked meals and walked with me. Looking back, I wish I had connected with a peer or someone who could demystify and speak to the experience I was about to embark on, and help clarify what to expect. Both the Ovarian Cancer Alliance of Oregon and SW Washington (OCA) and the Ovarian Cancer Research Fund Alliance (OCRFA) have peer mentoring programs.

My surgery (radical hysterectomy) was performed with the da Vinci surgical robot at Providence Portland, and the resulting pathology revealed not a clear cell uterine cancer at all, but endometrioid adenocarcinoma of the ovary, staged at IIC. (I did end up requesting a second opinion on the pathology because of the initial clear cell/uterine suspicion, and it came back with the same results.)

Initially, my chemotherapy included Taxol every week, and Carboplatin and Taxol every three weeks, supposedly for 18 weeks. I tolerated chemo well, (some neuropathy) and even looked forward to treatment —I was a big fan of those warm blankets—! For me, like some others, the main concern was that my white blood cell counts were low at the beginning of treatment, and despite bouts with Neulasta and Neupogen, got extremely low as treatment progressed. As a consequence my oncologist revised the initial treatment plan, and I switched to treatment with both chemos every three weeks and did not get quite all of it.

After treatment ended, it was a little like the “free-fall” I had experienced right after I was diagnosed. During the infusions I had felt as though I was taking positive action steps against my cancer, and now that they had ended I felt I should be doing something! I continued with my acupuncture and naturopathic visits, as well as regularly scheduled visits with my incredible doctors, because to me, having a healthy balance between western and eastern medicine has kept me positive, and active in my recovery. I found that seeking out answers to my medical questions about cancer generally has been a fascinating learning curve and has helped me move forward and feel a little less out-of- control with my disease.

I have made a point of searching out everything from fellowship writing groups, fitness programs (the OHSU “Get Fit” trial, and now “Fit Together”), yoga, meditation & mindfulness work (the “LivingWell” study), nutritional lectures, and webinars offered by the Ovarian Cancer Research Fund Alliance (OCRFA) – I try to take advantage of as many of the wellness programs that Compass, OHSU, Providence, the Ovarian Cancer Alliance of Oregon and SW Washington (OCAOSW) offer. They have all made a gratifying and positive impact on my life. I am also finding guidance by volunteering for some OCA events, and mentoring in the Woman to Woman program for the newly diagnosed. I take the business of allowing time to take care of myself a little more seriously than I did before diagnosis, and with so much support in our community it is not hard to find ways in which to do that.

I sometimes joke that having cancer, initially at least, is a full-time job, but it has also given me an unexpected opportunity to discover a lot about myself, and unearth a wealth of resources and fellowship in our community. In some ways my experience, like many others, has felt like a race for my life, but it has turned out to be so much more – a rewarding and surprising journey.